(First of all, if you didn’t already know that my hair has been falling out due to Alopecia, you should go back and read this post first. Otherwise you’ll be extremely confused.)
So, I did it. I bit the bullet. I took the plunge. I pulled the trigger. I shaved my head. (Literally…that last one isn’t an idiom.)
Actually, NATE shaved my head, which is exactly what any good husband wants to do for his wife after coming home from a long day of work at the office, right?
But we both knew it was time. We had been talking about it for awhile, and we finally just got to the point where we knew it was necessary, for several reasons. First, I totally underestimated how frustrating the shedding process would be. There was hair EVERYWHERE. It was coming out all over my house, my car, my pillow, the shower…you name it. The clincher –brace yourselves– was that the boys started eating it, because they put anything in their mouths…including hair. I don’t care who you are, that’s just nasty. So I was really REALLY ready for the shedding part to end.
Second, I really wanted to shave it before it got to the point where the bald spots were so obvious that I looked sick. I wasn’t at that point yet, but it was still coming out so fast that it wouldn’t have been long. And finally, I wanted to do it before we started support-raising and would be doing presentations to churches on a regular basis. I didn’t want bald spots on my head to be a distraction from the import message we had to share.
But mainly it was the thing about the boys eating it.
Here are a few of the spots if you want to know what I’m talking about. There are about 12 total. The dark spots are the bruising from where I had the injections.
So Tuesday night was the night. It took me a good twenty minutes and a pep talk from Nate to work up the courage to make the first cut, because I knew that there would be no going back. I divided my hair into a 4 scrawny ponytails and cut them off so I could donate the hair.
I was left with a super-short, really terrible haircut. Then Nate buzzed the rest of it all off.
I was fully expecting to look in the mirror and cry. I thought that I would hate it. I expected to feel a good bit of regret and panic. But when it was finished, Nate stepped back and said, “I think you’re going to like it. It kind of looks great. Go look in the mirror.” I didn’t believe him a bit, but I got up and went to look anyway.
Surprisingly, I didn’t cry. I looked at it and said, “This is kind of awesome. I think I’m pulling it off.”
And since I know that all you people are nothing but a bunch of rubberneckers who are only here in hopes of getting a view of the wreckage, I’m actually going to show you a picture. Y’all owe me.
See? I’m not kidding. I really did it. Thankfully I don’t have a funky-shaped head.
And to be honest, I haven’t been embarrassed about it at all. I expected to be very self-conscious, but I’ve gone around town wig-less for a good part of the week. Of course, strangers think I have cancer, and I have gotten all sorts of tips on how to cope with my chemotherapy. People are always very confused when I tell them I don’t have cancer. It’s a great ice-breaker.
Speaking of ice-breakers, I have been amazed at how many opportunities I’ve had to share my faith this week as a result of the bald head. People keep coming up and asking me about it, and I tell them about Alopecia. Then they inevitably ask, “Isn’t it hard? How do you cope with that as a woman?” I couldn’t have asked for a better inroad to share the gospel if I tried! I love sharing that the way I cope is through trusting in the Lord and fully giving every aspect of my life to him– hair included. People seem shocked when I tell them that I’m happy to give my hair to the Lord if He wants it, and they always want to know more. I love being able to tell them about how to trust Him. I might as well be wearing a sandwich board that says, “Ask me about Jesus!” People are straight-up asking me about my faith! I have probably told 15 people about the Lord since Wednesday, and those are conversations that never would have happened if I had hair on my head.
Then people ask me if I have a wig, and I tell them that I got one because we are raising support for the mission field, and I feel like I need to wear one when we do church presentations. People always say, “You’re going on the mission field? I want to hear more about that!” SERIOUSLY?! God has basically dropped an engaged and captive audience in my lap. I end up telling perfect strangers about Him and about my passion for missions at every turn, all because I decided not to wear my wig to go somewhere.
I’m unbelievably thankful that I have Alopecia. It’s crazy how much of a blessing it has become in my life. It makes me want to quit wearing the wig altogether, and I just might do it. So don’t be shocked when you see me out and about with my big red sunglasses, a pair of huge awesome earrings, and no hair on my head. I think all I need now is a tattoo and an electric guitar, ’cause I kinda feel like a rockstar.
- Hair. (or, “Balding Whack-a-Mole!”) (nateandnikkibonham.wordpress.com)